phanfiction–addiction:

I’ve already watched this scene over and over again and every time I’ve felt like I’ve missed something. I saw the arm rubbing immediately but it felt wrong to call it that. Now I know what Lukas is doing. Lukas isn’t just rubbing up and down Philip’s arm because he wants to. Lukas is caressing Philip’s arm and calming himself. At this point in the series and especially after this episode, everyone can see the impact the murders had on Lukas. The PTSD and fear of being outed consumes him. His only escape is being with Philip and knowing that he’s there. Watching this scene made me remember something Lukas said earlier when he was describing the visions he was seeing. I’m standing right behind him and I’m holding a frying pan but I can’t move. He shoots you. Guys, Lukas’ biggest fear isn’t being outed or ridiculed or even his father. His biggest fear is losing Philip. The one person who always comes back no matter how big he fucked up. The one person who not only understands him but also realizes that somethings can’t be understood and supports him anyway. The one person who loves him more than anything. And he has to remind himself that person is still sitting right beside him.